Sunday, June 3, 2012

Banana Life!

I felt like posting my banana life assignment for social class. I still have to draw out my banana poster. I love my social studies class! On Friday, we had banana splits. Being me, I have never had a banana split in my life! Don't judge me!! Mrs. Shepherd and my classmate Andrew worked at Dairy Queen and made the most amazing banana splits ever! Mrs. Shepherd was so cool! My stomach was really hurting from.....*ahem* my time of month *ahem* and I only wanted ice cream. She actually put three banana's in my ice cream and it actually tasted good.

So here is my banana lived! If you have time, read it! I'm pretty sure this is the most randomest thing I've ever posted in my entire life but anyways, I think it may have something to do with Yaoi.....haha!
          My life flashed before my eyes when I was practically eaten by a kid. Thankfully, his mom called him to clean his room so he left me in the kitchen, peeled and naked, to think about my life again. It felt so short.

            I’m proud to say that I was born in Costa Rica as a Del Monte banana. I lived with my family on a banana plantation as a happy banana. At times it would be confusing because we all looked the same. It was really depressing when my cousin who was on the other tree, tried to have babies with his girlfriend but couldn’t. We are just clones. It’s depressing, he told me.
 My tree, or grass if you want to be technical, was usually left alone. At times the workers would come by and check on us.

            One day, a man came and put this blue bag that smelled funny around us. It felt very suffocating. I heard the man say the bag was full of pesticides. The pesticides would keep the bugs and diseases from eating us. How nice of them.

            That same day, a big bird made out of rock flew over us and peed pesticides on us. It felt disgusting. I recall that bird is called an airplane. I don’t understand humans.

            It felt like years being caged in the blue bag until one day the same man freed us from the bag to measure our size. He said to his fellow worker that we are ready to be harvested. I thought to myself, where are we going? What is harvesting??

            I found out the answer when this big hand started to put this film that separated my family. Then suddenly, I felt a sudden jerk up and we were being lifted by another man. I began to scream when his friend took a big knife and cut us off from our home.

            This man carried us to a pulley system where it took us to a packing house. A woman sprayed us with water to wash us. Then one by one, we were taken and separated to be dunked in more water or pesticides.

            I was then tagged by this fat lady and put into a box full of banana’s I haven’t met before. I turned green. I didn’t know where we were going. It’s very dark.
            I socialized with other banana’s and heard their stories to make myself better. They either came from the same plantation as me or somewhere near the plantation. I met this one banana who was very smart. He had a girlfriend but was separated from her because the humans had other plans.

            I felt the box move and we were packed into a truck. The truck transported us to a boat. I didn’t even know how long we stayed on that boat. It was awfully boring but my new banana friends kept telling jokes to entertain each other.  
            I soon heard voices in the room and the humans unloaded us. The next thing I knew, my box is another storage room but it felt a bit different. My smart banana friend read the signs outside the box and we were being sprayed with ethoneal gas to ripen us slowly. He wouldn’t tell me what would happen when we were ripened so I guess I have to wait.

            Days passed and our box was opened. I saw my fellow banana’s and they were yellow. Hands were all over me and I was displayed on a shelf for other humans to see. I haven’t seen so many humans at once.

            It wasn’t long until a hand took me and placed me in a bag. Where is she taking me?

            I was soon in a home where the lady put me on the counter. It didn’t take to long until her son came along and started to unpeel me.

            Oh no. I'm being raped! I screamed but he didn’t hear me. And here I am. Thinking about my life.

            My flash back was ended when he came back, picked me up and slowly ate me. I blacked out. At least, I went to banana heaven.


  1. How can bananas be raped if they can't have sex?!?!

    1. That's a question I'll never answer.....wait! The banana doesn't like having its clothing taken off banana put it as rape.


If you have any manga/anime to recommend me, comment! If not, just comment anyways! They are always appreciated!